Wasn't I Paying Attention

I just had the strangest day of my life Worse than the last week with my first wife I let John borrow my truck He said he needed to get some stuff To pay some bills [?] City, it's barely a town For a place so pretty, it could bring you way down He kept his huntin' knife titanium-clipped To a nylon belt set high on his hip For self-defense It was a regular mornin' No red flags or warnings No, nothin' suspicious Wasn't I payin' attention? I didn't see the full gas can he'd set in the seat I just nodded and tossed him the keys Did I see shakin' in his hands? Was he makin' darker plans Than usual? John had been clean for over a year now We all thought he was in the clear now But it was a [?] talkin' [?] in the day It was a beast that never goes away It sleeps in your [?] It was a regular mornin' No red flags or warnings No, nothin' suspicious Wasn't I payin' attention? Every Sunday was another doomsday He'd say, "Last Judgement's not far away" He talked about evil in his blood He spoke of fire, he spoke of floods That's how he was It was a regular mornin' No red flags or warnings No, nothin' suspicious Wasn't I payin' attention? It was a regular mornin' No red flags or warnings No, nothin' suspicious Wasn't I payin' attention? John drove my truck down to the square He thought he would end it all right there He took off his coat, doused himself in gas Slit his own throat, climbed back into the cab And lit the match --- Wasn't I Paying Attention - Amanda Shires