Love Detective

We slept in this morning and she had to get ready in a hurry No time for her usual attention to detail And she ran out the door Slamming it behind her Leaving her keys swinging and jangling I stayed in bed until I heard the downstairs door shut Then peeked through the blinds And as soon as she was out of sight I went for the keys She never tried to make a secret of the box or The fact it was locked or even where she kept it But as I said at the time "If you've nothing to hide, why hide it?" It's one of those wee red cashbox things And she keeps it in a drawer by the bed Under some pictures and books Every key she has is on the same keyring It took me a while to find the right one I don't know I suppose I've had my doubts for a while there's been Hushed phone calls virtually every night Her friends stop talking when I come in the room They look at each other, and I don't know It's just a feelin' Anyway I eventually found the right key and It fitted perfectly in Put the box on top of the bed and opened it up There were these pictures of friends and ex's Letters, postcards, doodles, nothing bad And then I found some sort of s*x diary And I went to the latest entry It explicitly detailed a recent adventure up the park With a boy she said she had forgotten about And it got worse as it went on The dates never made sense There were people I had never even heard of Eventually I had to stop reading it Because I started to feel sick So I put everything back the way I found it Shut the drawer and phoned you See, I don't know what to do I keep having Fantasies about leaving her Dictaphone under the pillow Or following her when she goes to work I've been lying about where I'm going Just in case I can bump into her --- Love Detective - Arab Strap