Seven Drunken Nights

Oh, as I went home on Monday night As drunk as drunk could be I saw a horse outside the door Where my old horse should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her "Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that horse outside the door Where my old horse should be?" Ay, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool Still you cannot see That's a lovely sow that my mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more But a saddle on a sow, sure, I never saw before And as I went home on Tuesday night As drunk as drunk could be I saw a coat behind the door Where my old coat should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her "Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that coat behind the door Where my old coat should be?" Ay, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool Still you cannot see That's a woolen blanket that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more But buttons on a blanket, sure, I never saw before And as I went home on Wednesday night As drunk as drunk could be I saw a pipe upon the chair Where my old pipe should be Well, I called my wife and I said to her "Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that pipe upon the chair Where my old pipe should be?" Ay, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool Still you cannot see That's a lovely tin-whistle, that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more But tobacco in a tin-whistle, sure, I never saw before And I went home on Thursday nigh As drunk as drunk could be I saw two boots beneath the bed Where my old boots should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her "Will you kindly tell to me Who owns them boots beneath the bed Where my old boots should be?" Ay, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool Still you cannot see They're two lovely geranium pots me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more But laces in geranium pots I never saw before And as I came home on Friday night As drunk as drunk could be I saw a head upon the bed Where my old head should be Well, I called my wife and I said to her "Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that head upon the bed Where my old head should be?" Ay, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool Still you cannot see That's a baby boy that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more But a baby boy with his whiskers on, sure, I never saw before --- Seven Drunken Nights - Ronnie Drew