Monica Interview

Thanks for the interview Monica Now Monica everyone seems to think they know ALL there is to know About Monica Lewinsky but Monica could you tell us one thing That people would be surprised to know about you? "I used to be scared of the dick; now I throw lips to the shit Handle it like a real bitch.." Very interesting! Now Monica, there seems to be a lot of demands On your time. Could you tell us what a quiet evening with Monica Lewinsky would be like? "Got buffoons eatin my p***y while I watch cartoons.." Hmm, sounds like fun! Now Monica, who were your role models? "Zsa Zsa Gabor, Demi Moore, Prince Diane and all them rich bitches.." Now in the transcript, you refer to the President as Butthead Did the President have any nicknames for you? "Poon-poon nanny-nanny, punanni danni.." Ahh, cute! Now Monica, you and the President had a lot of phone s*x. What was the one thing that you would say to the President That would make him achieve orgasm? "Before you nut, I'ma dribble down your buttcheek Make you wiggle, then giggle just a little.." Now Vernon Jordan helped you get a job What's the first thing you said when you met Vernon Jordan? "It's on nigga what? p***y greased up Stack the G's up, keeps the knees up.." So are you saying you had an affair with Vernon Jordan too? "I made my intro, gettin fucked in the Pinto.." Monica you appear to be having s*x with everybody How do the interns treat you? "They be suckin blackberry molasses out my asses.." Now now that we're on it, how come you never had s*x with Al Gore? "I got no patience for little dick tastin.." What about Ken Starr? "He be lookin fruity, but you still can eat the booty.." Now Monica, do you have any regrets about your relationship With the President? "Somethin I wanted, but I never was pushy The motherfucker never ate my p***y.." Hey, here's the President right now, Bill Clinton! Now Mr. President, before we go, Is there anything you'd like to say to Monica Lewinsky? "Bitch shut the fuck up! Get the fuck out of here!"