Hello hello, may I speak to the E?
This is me, is this the doctor M.D.?
Yo P it's kinda early, who's there Laverner and Shirley?
Is it Kate and Allie, or some other girlie?
Well anyway, yo P you know I'm lazy
Callin me this time of hour you must be crazy
Excuse me, but I'm sorry E Double
It's a terrible situation and it might cause trouble
Throw on your coat jump in your Benz and come over
Why P?
Yo, I think Jane is on my sofa
What?
Last night I was all alone
Couldn't watch the boob tube, because my fuse was blown
Picked up the bat phone, to drop a line to you
Maybe 10:15, or maybe 10:22
Where was I?
I don't know, you wasn't there
Threw on the link Rolex watch and fresh gear
I grabbed my key, along with the cash flow
Shifted out the door to the local disco
Where'd you go, not to that ran down pub
Hell no, I was coolin at a club
It was Spanish night, so I was drinkin Molta
Doing a little tango, plus a little salsa
Seen a fly girl, standin next to me
So I slid over to her very non-chalantly
She was DEF, body perfectly fit
She was packin, a 300-E with the kit
I said, "Kitten, how ya doin miss?"
I said, "Hello my name is Parrish"
"Hi, my name is Cris"
"Can I buy you a drink?"
"Yes"
"What will it be?"
"A martini and Rossi, Asi Spumante
By the way is that your Caadillac Allante
Parked outside right next to my Monte
Car? You can call it, my ex-husband bought it."
POOF! My ego appeared and said it's time to go for it
"This place is a drag, grab your coat and bag
We'll have drinks on the house, back at my pad."
We got to my house we walked through the door
Threw on "Night and Day" by
Al. B Sure
She grabbed me, gave me kiss on the lips
So I grabbed the cold booty and caressed the hips
I got ahead of myself, because I wanted to flirt
Took off the G-strings and the V-neck skirt
POOF! my ego appeared
Yeah it's time to do work
I felt the movement below so it's time to react
I went in my back utility belt and pulled out a jim hat
I bust a move, when it came to that
But then she freaked it, and grabbed the bozack
Started doin' it, then she called me the master
You got bigger, better, stronger and much faster
At first I laughed, as if it was a joke
But then my heart skipped a beat, and I lost a stroke
I said to myself, oh no it couldn't be
The J to the A to the N to the E
Yo P don't tell me it was Jane you were douchin'
With the Anita Baker haircut
Nah more like Whitney Houston
While the record's still playing to Al B. Sure's "Effect Mode"
Stay tuned, to be continued on the next episode
Peace, I'm Audi 5000
---
Jane II - EPMD
