3 Balloons

I call you from the car to say ill be there in a while A short plane ride and I will get to see your pretty smile There's nothing on the radio- I fiddle with the dial Then I see a sign- the airports just another mile I check my bags and think about how much I hate to fly And as I near security I almost start to cry Well I hope that law enforcement agents can't tell from my face I've got 3 balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air Cause with 4 balloons of heroin its getting crowded up in there Crowded up in there My mind is all a jumble and my blood is cold as ice I dread the thought of having to unload this merchandise Relax, I say, its not so bad- it might feel kinda nice Besides, who hasn't had a finger up there ince or twice? I must remember don't leave any drugs inside the host I did that once and a girl who tossed my salad overdosed Well I say a little prayer- Hail Maria, Full of Grace I've got 3 balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air And I swear I'm farting lines of blow into my underwear From my derriere I was a little eager when I loaded up my stash 5 balloons of ecstasy, 6 balloons of hash 8 balloons of L.S.D, 9 of sensi mild A box of chinese fireworks- a Guatemalan Child I've made it to the gate now and my joy I can't contain I board the aircraft; take my seat in the cockpit of the plane As I taxi down the runway, I get a smile on my face I've got 3 balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place Flight crew prepare for takeoff as I lift us into air And by the way, does anyone want to buy a Guatemalan child? From my derriere --- 3 Balloons - Stephen Lynch